Feeling like a failure

There are moments in life when you feel like a failure.

Maybe it’s because of something you did, or have failed to do. Maybe it was a mistake, or your mistake was putting on too much expectation. Maybe it was out of fear, where you wanted to prove yourself, but failed miserably in front of people who trusted you. Maybe you were overly confident, and the fall was too high when the outcome didn’t meet your expectations. Maybe it was just you comparing yourself to the people around you—to the masks that cover the faces of the people behind the profiles. Maybe it’s just you being bad to yourself.

In any of these cases, you feel like a failure. You put yourself down. You ask yourself “how can I never make the same mistake again?”, and wonder “will I ever make it again?”.

The thoughts consume you.

It’s hard to breathe.

All your efforts to put yourself up again are bind to that failure, as if you’re building yourself from a deck of cards. One of the cards is the failure. And someone might just pull the failure card from under you to make it all come falling down.

How to get out of this rut?

Maybe you can’t.

Maybe the only option is to try. To do something. To act.

It might mean you will fail again. Or someone will pull that card from under you. And you’ll have to pick yourself back up, and keep going.

I guess that’s it.

There’s no other option but to keep going.

Just do it.

Little by little, if you’re patient, you can build enough resilience. Or at least enough proof that your failure is not going to repeat itself. That it will become a learning experience that shaped your path forward.

Turn the page.
Start a new chapter.
Word by word.
Line by line.
Paragraph by paragraph.
Page by page.